Some people say that when two friends get too close, they may end up falling in love with each other, or in a more dramatic situation, one may end up falling for the other.
The latter situation though, hits closer to home!
I always wonder if I have this large mark on my forehead that says, "Girl Friend Material" (take note, it's not the one word 'girlfriend'). In fact, one of my girl friends told me that maybe I was made to be just the guy's friend and not the girlfriend. And it made me stop and think that, yeah, I guess I am!
It's not that I'm making it a habit to fall for every guy friend I have, I just happen to have a weakness on guys who would give me "the attention" (whether it's being too sweet or being too annoying, in a good way that is).
This I-fell-for-a-friend-who-doesn't-feel-thesame started way, way back!
At a very young age of 9, I happen to like this classmate-slash-friend of mine. My first crush 'Isko', the object of my baby love! Sad to say though, he likes one of my girl friends back then. It's one big major suck-up for one innocent heart! I guess my invisibility mode was turned on even before!
Then came my puppy love, my childhood friend. When I was in grade 5, I happen to develop a huge crush on 'Ken' who lives across our home. That crush went on for five long years! My young heart kept that affection even when my family decided to move into another place. But eventually every treasured feeling shattered when I found out that he was already my bestfriend's boyfriend... Sounds like a title of a Hollywood movie right?!
Of course, it comes in threes as what people say...
My recent friend-falling stunt was my college guy friend. He was my 'little bro' up until that moment when I started feeling giddy and excited everytime we're together. The time spent together in school and on the way home led me into falling for him in the end... and then 'we' ended. The friendship was irrevocably stained.
Sadly, they all ended up quite differently from what I have in mind. All of it may have left me with a broken heart but still, I'm happy... because I know that when I decide to fall in love, I LOVE REAL!
And after going through all of these I came to know more of earned friendships now ruined and lost... of desired love shattered and unreturned.
But hey, I believe that life, like some of the movies, don't always end up with "... and they live happily ever after", not even when the words "The end" appear, as long as the final credits don't stop rolling, the film goes on... and so does life!
xoxo,
mae =)
