Need To Change

My Life... Such a broad thing to talk about... I think I can't wrap up my Life's story in one day. Yeah, sounds exagerrating but it's definitely true...

Though I don't have that picturisque and vivid childhood memory, but I know deep down inside that those memories were fun-filled and close-to-perfect.

Being the youngest in the family my parents lavished me with things I needed and wanted though we're not financially well off. I was the only child in our family that went to a private school from preparatory class up until college. Yeah, I was the "lucky child". I was given all the attention, in fact, there are times I feel that I was given "too much" attention. It's too much that sometimes I wish they would stop bothering me and stop noticing me.

I love to live a carefree life, I want to do things wherein no one would stop me or would reprimand me if I did something stupid. I want to commit my own mistakes and I want to learn my own lessons. I want to be away from my family's "eyes". Since I do really want to be far away from them, there are times that my illogical thinking gets on my way and will eventually make me wish that they all mind their own business and just leave me be.

But then selfish as I may sound, I would instantly run back into their loving arms whenever crises, spicifically financial crisis, hits me along the way. Heartless I am indeed, spoiled brat who's so self-centered and who only cares about anything that would benefit myself. I am totally aware of that and I am so aware of this "ugly" me that most of the times my conscience would scream at me and slap me on my face trying to make me realize that I NEED TO CHANGE! YES! I need to change, it's a must for me to change, and it's URGENT!

I know I better get moving and start being mature. I need to stop thinking about myself and try to be sensitive enough about my family. It's time for me to really try to be a part of them, to be one of them. 

xoxo,


Mae =)